Social media isn't social

In an age of self-promotion, have we lost the ability to connect?

I more or less logged off of the last social media platform I’m on about 4 months ago. For over 2 months, I didn’t even have it on my phone.

I don’t like it.

So why do I keep going back?

In my case, it was a social outlet. But something has shifted and I think it might be time to address it.

Keeping in mind that social media only got popular among the non-college age crowd in about 2011. And in my opinion, that was the heyday. People more or less continued their “real-world” interactions online and also extended that to people they would have otherwise not been in touch with.

Before 2010-2011, we went to online news sites for news. The 2008 election was notably influenced by “the internet” but not social media. The 2012 election was the first time a candidate had a social media strategy. That election changed the way people consumed social media. The 2016 election was a minefield on social media and also (again - my opinion) when people began to soapbox and debate more than be social and interact.

People were ugly. Myself included.

Social media suddenly became an amplification platform rather than a connection platform.

Election and politics to the side (please!) I’ve noticed a similar progression in terms of what individuals post. It used to be “Here’s a picture of us on vacation, Little Timmy loved the donkeys at the Grand Canyon.” And now it is much more akin to “Tim wants to go back to visit the donkeys he loved as a child, you can cashapp him at $Timlovesdonkeys” or “I took a trip to see the Donkeys at the Grand Canyon as a child and I am now leading expeditions to do just that, message me for trip details.”

Don’t get me wrong… wonderful things are happening on social media. Including political movements and grassroots awareness that is spreading wider and faster than ever before.

But the sludge you have to wade through to get to the good stuff is almost overwhelming isn’t it.

Case in point - Taylor Swift.

Now, I have always been a fan. I’m not a Swiftie, but I genuinely enjoy her music and more importantly - her writing and what she has to say. I think she is a voice that younger version of me needed, and the older version of me loves to applaud. She has taken a stand in some areas and said some things that needed to be said. She’s changing things - and not just ownership of music rights.

She’s a powerhouse all on her own.

And yet… we’re all inundated with “Taylor and Travis.” And because it’s social media, everyone hops on that bandwagon to gain likes/viewers/shares and discuss each little aspect of any video clip that they have. It’s exhausting.

So is the Stanley cup thing.

And this side-show… has taken the place of connection.

I remember a time, not too long ago when we were complaining about how the 24-hour news cycle impacted the information we received about noteworthy events. Suddenly, it became sensationalist garbage that they could summarize in neat little bullet points and sound bytes.

And the meat or heart of the matter simply fell to the side.

And I’m seeing it in abundance on social media. Our economy is such that most people have a second job, or a side hustle. If it’s not leading donkey expeditions, it’s organizing closets, food trucks, landscaping, (don’t get me started on all the new marketers) or any of the abundance of MLM companies that people are getting involved with. The easiest way to find customers is to talk about them with your friends and family… and the easiest and quickest way to do that is to post on your social media.

So… we all do. Yes, me too! I’ll be posting about this post on social media.

And now on top of the abundance of paid advertising on the platforms, now all of our friends and family are using the platforms to get the word out about whatever it is that they are into.

That’s all fine, but it’s drowning out what we’re all there for. It creates a situation akin to walking down a street looking for an update about your cousin’s new baby and having to navigate around people standing on soapboxes with megaphones and cardboard signs yelling about how you can find their lotion or collectors cups or vintage 6-cylinder motors for German automobiles inside their doors.

It’s absolute chaos.

Back around to the earlier premise of this piece. Social media isn’t social anymore.

What do we do to bring that back?

I’m going to write about it next week, but I think, essentially what we need to do is to focus on connecting and relating as humans and spend a lot more time together offline. And maybe, leave the social platforms to the wolves.

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